Thursday, November 3, 2011

Going natural: the dark story behind it

My hair has been natural for two years. While I may play it down (it really doesn't seem like a huge deal sometimes,) let me give you the low-down, nitty gritty, bare bones story.

Imagine that everywhere you look the definition of beautiful hair is hair that you can never "naturally" have; you're taught that it is supposed to be your "crowning glory" but you feel like it's more of a "dunce cap." The girls on movies (i.e. princess diaries) always have straight shiny hair if they're popular, while curly hair seems to secure them a spot in the unpopular weird crowd. Every day with your hair is a battle again all natural elements: rain, humidity, and even too much touching. Although people say your hair is pretty, you have noticed that these comments are directly related to when your hair is straight. Your hair is not even normally called curly, it's kinky. It's tangly. It's impossible to comb. It's short. It's not shiny. It breaks off easily. Welcome to my world: you are black.
Relaxed and flat-ironed
Don't get me wrong...I could do the straight long hair. The hair that (mostly black) people touched and asked how I grew it (to which I shrugged and said "Ummmm I just don't do anything to it.) I did it by relaxing it. After I washed it though, it would curl up. I couldn't figure it out! Why was my hair not like my sisters where all you do is just blow dry it and then it's fine? After not feeling like going through the trouble I started letting it air-dry. Mostly in the summer. It was a big, half-curly, half straight, hot mess. I loved it. I felt free. It bounced, it had attitude, it angered and frustrated me, and at the same time was TOTALLY ME! 
I hated getting relaxers and only had them done about every 3 months because they burned my head sometimes, they made my hair stiff and weird, and they never straightened certain parts of my hair...

In August of 2009 I decided that I'd had enough and that I was sick to death of relaxers. The beginning of the end. If I had time I would go on to tell you the rest of the story, the one behind the "Oh I'm a black girl going natural"! {The comments from family and friends (good and bad), the hair disasters, the styles that worked, and the frame of mind that it produced.} I just don't have time. You'll have to wait for part two, if it ever comes.


  1. Elizzy - I can't tell you to love what God put on your head. I can only tell you that I love it. I think you are so beautiful, inside and out and you make me smile every time I see your picture no matter what is on your head.

    My hair is stark white and dry with no shape anymore cause of all the meds I take. God has his agenda.

    Waiting for part two.

  2. Suki, it's a love hate relationship.

  3. Lizzi, it makes me sad that this is so distressing to you. I like your hair pulled straight back, like in the profile pic on this blog.(where you have the turquoise shirt on)
    I think Angela Davis had it right when she just cut her hair short and let it do its thing.................founding what has become know as the "afro"

  4. Lizzi, I totally relate. I went natural approximately 14 years ago. Stay with whatever is beautiful in your own eyes!

  5. I love your natural hair!!! You look beautiful no matter how your hair is styled, but I really like it natural best. :) Humm, this was just the tease, wasn't it? hehe...

  6. Rita, that's from when I first started my blog :-)
    Loretta, I was "unnatural" for about 7 yrs since I got my relaxer after all my sisters.
    Zuda, how'd you guess this was the tease? lol yeah...I'll probably do the next one early next week.


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