Why I’m a less stressed bride

For those who are popping by for the first time, welcome! This is my first post at a new blog. Alright, let’s get into it.

Wow, is wedding planning a lot of work or what? I have found so far that it’s not quite as stressful as I’ve always been told it is.

Wait! I know what you’re thinking, “She’s saying she’s not stressing about her wedding? She’s lying.”

If that was what I meant, I would indeed be lying. At first I was so overwhelmed by the thought of planning a wedding; so much so, that I asked my fiance if we could possible not start planning for a couple weeks and just enjoy being engaged. Being the wonderful man that he is, of course he agreed. I’d planned so many events for the church, helped each of my sisters with their weddings, thrown all of their bridal showers and subsequent baby showers; but for once I was supposed to plan for myself! I wasn’t used to basing the decision-making around what I wanted! Is that even a thing? To add to my stress, Wolf (aka my fiance) suggested that we get married in 4 months, when originally we were thinking more like 6 or 7 months! Talk about silently freaking out!

Basically, there is a reason why-even as a chronically stressed person, planning my wedding hasn’t been so rough. Read on…

The first thing we did when we agreed on our wedding date, was to talk out how we felt about wedding planning. We are talk-it-out kinda people, sometimes it’s a good thing and sometimes it isn’t! I don’t know if everyone has this discussion, but it is something I don’t see mentioned much if ever. Remember that each of these conversations will vary from couple to couple, but in my opinion it should be had. Along with this being key, the three things below have been the main reason I’ve been more grounded.

  1. He wanted to be very involved, and since he’s a such a focused, list-following person (and I’m not), I loved that idea. He brings a lot of logic and systems for accomplishing things, where I’m more big ideas and visual presentation.
  2. We are in a long distance relationship, so most of our conversations are over the phone or webcam; because of that, we decided that if either of us started feeling like wedding talk was taking over our lives we could suggest that it be discussed later. It’s worked for us.
  3. We agreed that “How it’s supposed to be” wouldn’t be a statement we would concern ourselves with. If we don’t want cake, we won’t have cake. As a people-pleaser, this decision was life-changing for me;  by nailing it down ahead of time, we could be prepared for when people gave well-meaning advice and calmly tell them our wedding didn’t have to be “normal”.

So those are the things that are helping me, and although I still get kinda crazy sometimes, most of it has to do with planning to move to the other side of the country (more on that another time) than our upcoming nuptials. I hope that useful info, I’m so excited to share all of what is going on in the coming months!

Here’s what you can expect…

I am a budget and DIY bride. In some cases that adds to the stress and the cost, but not if you’re careful. In my next post I’ll be describing some of my tips for saving cash as a bride, some amazing resources for planning your own wedding, and little things I’m doing to save myself some mental strain. I’m going through this thing now, so come along for the ride!